


Doubt

by PeanutButterKohai



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Depressing, Gen, Poor Prompto, Prompto Is Sad, maybe promptis if I continue it, sads sads sads, self doubt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-15
Updated: 2017-10-23
Packaged: 2019-01-17 16:09:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12369315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PeanutButterKohai/pseuds/PeanutButterKohai
Summary: Takes place in high schoolNoctis goes away for a while but when he starts ignoring Prompto's texts, Prompto spirals into depression.A glimpse into Prompto's anxiety and self doubt.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey so this is my first fic ever. I was just feeling some sads today and I decided to channel that through my best chocoboi since me and sunshine boy have so much in common. Hope it's not too hard to read

Two days.

It had been two days since Prompto’s last contact with Noctis. Even then, it was barely a message. The prince had written a succinct two syllables in response to a funny cat picture the blond had sent. 

haha

Not even a smiley face. Or a laughing face. Or anything really. Prompto had sent what he figured was a safe answer. An emoticon of a cat, which was as little of a response as the prince had sent him, he was aware of that. Painfully aware of that. And he knew that he was grasping at straws looking for any way to forward a nonexistent conversation but he couldn’t not text just in case the prince wanted to talk this time.

He had stared at his frustratingly silent phone indecisively for a good fifteen minutes before typing out How’s it going? But stopped short with his finger hovering over the send button. It felt like his lungs were creeping into his throat the more he stared, heart palpitating in irrational fear. Nearly that exact message had been sent off by the blond a total of three times in the last few days, one earning an brief answer and the other two answered only by his next attempts at conversation. He deleted the unsent text and placed his phone face down on the couch beside him. The rest of the day was spent avoiding his phone and reassuring himself that Noct would text when he had time. But by the time Prompto dragged himself to bed that night, exhausted from nerves, he had amassed a total of 0 messages.

The trend continued into the next day. And then two became four and any of the anxiety that had been building over the last week and a half caught up to him all at once, crashing over him like a wave. He tried running it off, that permanent tightness in his chest, but it didn’t help much. School was almost a welcome change because at least it was something to focus on but sometimes the same feeling would come creeping back in the middle of class and he’d have to sneak away to the bathroom to try to force it back down. The worst part was he knew he was being ridiculous. He knew he was being pathetically clingy and irrational but simply knowing that didn’t make it stop. Knowing that didn’t ease his breathing the times when he dropped his guard and the desperation squeezed the air out of his lungs. At least before now he had been managing it but he was at his wits end. Noct had forgotten about him. 

He’s just really busy doing his job. You know, being the prince of Lucis at an important political conference. If he had the time to text you he would. The rational part of his brain reasoned.

But even if it were the case, did it really take so much effort to send off a hey sorry I’ve been busy. We’ll talk when I get home. 

But Prompto couldn’t let himself dwell on it or he knew he would just make himself feel worse. So, even though it was the last thing he wanted to do, he dragged himself off the couch and pulled on his sneakers. The house was entirely devoid of real food and Prompto was getting a little tired of the taste of instant noodles. Besides if you don’t eat healthy you’ll put all that weight back on and Noctis will have even more reason to hate you. Hissed a snide voice in the back of his head.

Somehow he found himself at the corner store, having barely registered the walk. His brain was too preoccupied with the ever prevalent self-pitying haze and trying to find the mental energy to figure out what he’d need for some decently healthy meals. Pushing the door open, Prompto bee lined it for the refrigerated section figuring eggs and milk were probably a good start. He gathered up those, plus a loaf of bread, some lunch meat and a head of lettuce before heading to the till and depositing his modest collection on the counter. A passive looking, splotchy faced teenager started scanning the items through without so much as a glance of acknowledgement, which Prompto found himself appreciating. He hadn’t bothered to check his hair or anything before he left and probably looked about as bad as he felt.

“21.60.” the cashier drawled. Prompto didn’t even realize he’d spaced out but apparently all the items had been rung through and bagged already. He’d just started digging out his wallet when a familiar face caught his eye. There, staring at him from the magazine rack was the face of the person he’d been trying not to think about, the Prince of Lucis. It was a candid photo of Noct looking to the left away from the camera, all dark attractively mussed hair, stunning blue eyes and striking regal features. The prince’s photo was front and centre but shared the cover with several other men Prompto didn’t recognize. In red lettering over the pictures read “INSOMNIA’S MOST ELIGIBLE BACHELORS”. But what really caught Prompto’s attention was an even smaller picture of Noct on the bottom right corner with two men Prompto recognized as Ignis and Gladiolus, Noctis’ advisor and shield respectively who Prompto had met a few times. The three were sitting on a patio somewhere looking unusually laid back. The caption read “Pictures of the Prince of Lucis’ Vacation with ruggedly handsome bodyguards. Pg. 18.” Any other time Prompto might have laughed but one particular observation had turned his blood cold. Noct was on vacation.

He wasn’t busy with political affairs. He was on vacation somewhere, relaxing with Ignis and Gladious.

And ignoring Prompto’s texts.

It took a while for Prompto to realize the cashier was talking to him. It felt like he could barely hear her through the sound of his own blood pounding in his ears.

“U-uh.. sorry.” he managed to sputter out before bolting out of the store groceries forgotten. He made it a couple blocks before he collapsed onto his knees on the sidewalk. 

Noctis was ignoring him. His only friend. The one person that gave him the time of day. The one person that cared enough to offer Prompto rides home after a late night of gaming. Or even just after school even though Prompto’s place was in the other direction. Clearly he’d messed up somewhere. He’d done something, something to make Noctis realize how worthless he is, how useless and utterly beneath him he is. He didn’t realize he was crying until he saw his own teardrops staining the concrete, too preoccupied with trying to breathe around the lump in his throat. 

God, get ahold of yourself. What would Noctis think of you now.

Taking an extra minute to try to steady his breathing, Prompto gritted his teeth and pushed himself up, numbly noting his stinging knees which he’d probably managed to scrape up a bit. Shaking hands came up to wipe at the wetness on his cheeks and dripping messily off his nose. Thankfully it looked as if no one had wandered by during his little episode, or if they did, they hadn’t made any comment. His feet felt like lead as he forced himself forward towards his house, keeping his head down in case any passersby were to get close enough to note his puffy, red eyes and quivering lip.

By the time he made it home the sun had almost entirely set. He let himself into the dark, gapingly empty house and dropped onto the sofa. Out of habit more than anything he pulled his phone out of his jacket pocket and clicked the top button turning on the screen.

Message from Noct

Prompto blinked owlishly at the entirely too bright screen before swiping the notification right to open the message.

hey prom! Sorry, it’s been a crazy coupla weeks but I’ll tell you about it when I get home tomorrow :P hope your weeks been ok

Blue eyes scanned over the message once. Twice. He clicked on the message box and hovered his still shaking fingers over the keyboard mind suddenly a blank.

Hey

He started and promptly deleted it. Letting his hands and the phone with them fall limply in his lap, Prompto closed his eyes. Noct had been off having fun with friends he really cared about. He didn’t need Prompto the same way Prompto need him so… What was the point in rushing to respond? Let him wait for once. Prompto thought sourly and tossing his phone off to the side of the couch he got up to get ready for bed and just generally ignore Noctis. But as he was brushing his teeth his resolve began to crumple. Noct wasn’t intentionally ignoring him. He was just enjoying his vacation and possibly his time away from his life in insomnia, Prompto included. And whatever the reason, he didn’t want to talk to Prompto before, but he did now and it would be unfair to give him the silent treatment for something he didn’t know he did. For something he didn’t even DO. Because really, it was all Prompto wasn’t it? Noctis wasn’t obligated to text him all the time or to answer every text sent to him. And it wasn’t his fault Prompto was so worthless he couldn’t make any other friends and clung desperately to every shred of Noctis’ attention he could get his greedy hands on. God, if Noct knew what he was really like, he would get as far away from Prompto as possible. Even considering giving the prince the silent treatment like that was almost… Manipulative wasn’t it?

Feeling somehow even worse now that he’d finally gotten the response, Prompto finished brushing his teeth and padded back over to his phone, abandoned on the sofa. He picked it up gingerly and unlocked it to read over Noct’s message again.

hey all good! we’ll chat tomorrow! hope you had a good time :)

He felt like he wanted to throw up but it was over. It was fine. He was fine. Noct was still his friend and he didn’t have any idea how pathetic of a person Prompto was.

He just had to make sure it stayed that way.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote a second chapter!! Crazy! Honestly it was just going to be the one chapter since I was just looking for a way to vent my feelings but I really didn't expect the lovely reviews and kudos and waaaaahhh ;.; Thank you everyone. 
> 
> And thank you my best soggy goth boy (HuntersImpala) for editing my chapters <3 My grammar is a train wreck and I'm still such a wee babby writer so thank the six for this angel.
> 
> Any who, here's some more pain!

He really was an asshole.

 

Hanging out with Noct was exactly how it always was. Nothing had changed. Of course why would Prompto  expect it to. His little mental breakdown was entirely a product of his own imagination. Why else would he be so quick to assume the worst of someone who had only shown him kindness? He was a special kind of scum. Noct had no idea, clearly, and Prompto wasn’t about to make him aware of it. It took all of five minutes for Noct to debunk any irrational thoughts Prompto concocted about his friends view of him. The prince explained casually how exhausting the conference was but it was cut short so Gladio insisted on getting out and seeing the city. It  was Ignis who confiscated Noct’s phone, citing something about ‘an amazing opportunity that wouldn’t be squandered by playing phone games” and Noctis admitted he enjoyed the brief reprieve despite his initial reluctance. He offered another apology for not responding to all of Prompto’s texts, but the blond dismissed it as quickly as the words left the prince’s mouth.

 

“It’s cool”, Prompto shrugged, feigning nonchalance.  “I’m just glad you had fun and weren’t stuck in a boring conference the whole time!”  _ I know you’ve got better things to do than spend all your time texting a plebe like me.  _

 

And that was that. The rest of the hangout was completely normal. Prompto gave Noct all of the notes he’d taken for him in class, they whined about the biology project due next week and then played video games until Ignis called them for dinner. Prompto was surprised to find his appetite was significantly smaller than usual, likely a result of eating only a couple cup noodles a day for the last week and a half. He found an unprecedented swell of pride at that.  _ Can’t get fat again if you don’t have an appetite to begin with and it’s one less reason for Noct to leave you. _ He shook off the sudden onslaught of negativity and tried to focus on spending time with his best friend, which was easy to do really. Being around Noct made him feel so safe and happy. And so damn grateful that someone as amazing as the other boy genuinely cared about a nobody like him. These emotions surfaced so easily around Noct that he felt silly for ever doubting him. Everything was fine and Prompto could just pretend like the last week and a half didn’t happen.

 

Except as soon as he left, the undercurrent of doubt wormed back into his subconscious. With the door shut behind Prompto,  the ominous shadow of anxiety and self doubt sprang forward to latch onto any thought that Noct didn’t want him. Every action and word Noctis had put forward throughout the day was uprooted by Prompto’s mind, looking for anything that could lead to the conclusion that Noctis was better without him. It seemed it wasn’t so easy to shake off the unease that had settled in his gut from the events of the last few days.

 

He was suddenly painfully aware of just how much he didn’t deserve Noct. This, out of all of the ridiculous negative thoughts his brain kept  throwing at him, was the only one that seemed to invariably hold true. He had always been overly aware of Noct’s status- there was no denying the gaping difference in social status there. But aside from all of that Noct was so… Good. So caring, open, charming, understanding... All the things Prompto knew he wasn’t. He felt like a leech latching onto the other boy to feed off his positive energy. Nervously, Prompto wondered if Noct saw him that way too.  _ Of course he does,  _ his mind whispered to him.  _ After all, you  _ _ have nothing to offer in this friendship _ . He was insecure, unstable, volatile.

 

He was toxic.

 

The rest of the night found Prompto laying wide awake in his bed staring at the ceiling, mind going a mile a minute. Toxic. He was convinced that was the most accurate term for his mental state. The term ‘parasitic’ also seemed particularly poignant in regard to his friendship with Noctis. Noctis, the kindest person he’d ever met. Noctis, the crowned prince of Lucis and heir to the throne. Noctis, who already had so much on his plate and didn’t need a nobody like Prompto complicating his life further. The realization felt like a brick in his stomach and he decided right then, with icy cold resolve, to do the only thing he could think of to fix this.

 

He had to remove himself from Noctis’ life.

 

Though cutting ties entirely was out of the question. For one, Prompto knew he was too much of a coward to ever properly end the friendship. Plus, there was also the letter from Lady Lunafreya to consider. She’d asked that he remain at Noctis’ side and the Astrals know he tried his best to be good enough to look like he deserved to stand beside the prince. But he realized now that the real problem was so much bigger than losing a few pounds.. Sure, he could look like he belonged at Noctos’ side, but feeling that way was another matter entirely. Deep down, if Prompto was being honest with himself, he knew he couldn’t belong, no matter how hard he tried. One can’t will away their mental defects the same way one can shed weight. 

 

He supposed the best he could do at this point would be to phase himself out enough that he wasn’t always dependant on the prince but could still keep an eye on Noctis from afar should he ever need Prompto. It probably wasn’t what Lady Lunafreya had meant in her letters,but having never met in person, she had clearly gotten an entirely wrong impression of Prompto. Although he tried to be everything she would have wanted from him, no amount of improvement could ever make someone like him worthy of the Prince of Lucis.

 

It was cruel, he thought with a bitter laugh, that he was able to experience more happiness and compassion than he ever had or could ever deserve, only to go to back to watching from the shadows completely alone. It would have been better if he’d never made friends with the prince. It would have been easier never knowing what it was like to have a friend.

 

The emptiness of his house never seemed so loud.

 

\---

 

Avoiding Noctis at school proved to be more of a challenge than he’d anticipated. As the day went on, Prompto became increasingly aware of the amount of time he spent glued to the Prince’s side, or in the case, the other way around. Noct sat in front of him in homeroom and History and although Prompto had Language, Programming and Algebra to himself, he was with the prince again in Biology. Biology where they were paired together for a project.

 

Great.

 

Somehow, Prompto  managed to make some bullshit excuse about having to look something up at the library during lunch, to which Noct looked almost disappointed. That look alone was almost enough to crumble Prompto’s resolve but he mentally reprimanded himself, reminding himself that he was doing this  _ for _ Noct’s sake. So he forced an apologetic smile before running off, leaving the other boy to have lunch by himself.  _ It was for the best. _

 

He had forgotten however that it wasn’t as easy as running away when the two of them had a collaborative project to do. 

 

Currently the prince was hunched over Prompto messily scribbled notes from the previous class.

 

“I mean it looks like you already did most of the leg work with coming up with the prediction, hypothesis and materials list so I guess… You can just tell me what you need me to do?” The prince was skimming over the work Prompto had done the previous week while Noctis was away.

 

Away on his awesome vacation with his his awesome royal friends.

 

Noct was staring at him. Probably expecting an answer

 

“O-oh uh... “ Prompto stammered suddenly feeling flustered. “We just uh.. Have to do the experiment and record our findings?” he explained, gingerly taking the notes back. “I already did all of the initial recordings so uh…. Just gotta..” he gestured lamely “fill in the rest..”

 

Noct stared at him for a moment longer, brows furrowing slightly. “Hey is everything ok? You’ve been acting... I dunno. Not very… Prompto-y.”

 

Completely caught off guard by the earnest show of concern, the blond just blinked back at his friend. “Uh.. huh?”

 

“Like, I dunno you’re usually just more..” the prince waved his arms vaguely.

 

Prompto sputtered out a laugh “What, a bird? Are you calling me a bird?”

 

Noct’s eyebrows shot up “No! I’m not calling you a bird!” he huffed with a smile pulling at his mouth. “I just!” He flapped his arms again “You know what I mean!”

 

“No I really can’t say I do.” he mimicked his friend's arm flapping exaggeratedly “reeeally looks like some kind of bird to me. Wait is this some kind of chocobo joke about my hair??”

 

Noctis rolled his eyes at Prompto, and turned their attention back to the project. Just like that,the subject was dropped and the awkward atmosphere from earlier was gone. It was almost painful how easy it was for Prompto to fall into his usual rhythm with Noct. Easy enough that he forgot about his pledge to distance himself from the prince and spent the rest of the class joking around with Noctis. When the bell rang to signal the end of the school day, Prompto found himself back at Noct’s apartment playing video games until the wee hours of the morning. 

 

“It’s one o’clock…” The dark haired teen grumbled groggily. He was sitting lopsided, off to the right side of the couch, leaning heavily on the arm with his right leg pulled up against himself and the other hanging off the couch. At some point he’d ended up with a pillow clutched between his body and his arms which were wrapped around the pillow, hands grasping a console controller. Prompto was spread across the couch on his side, head propped up against the armrest. His feet had subconsciously found their way into the prince’s lap. Blankets, once shared equally between the two boys,  somehow had been piled on top of the prince, burying him under their soft fleece.  A mostly empty pizza box was spread over the coffee table.

 

“Ah shit…” Prompto stretched one arm over his head and let out a loud yawn, the other hand coming up to rub at his eyes, controller laying forgotten beside him. “I missed the last bus…”

 

Noctis shrugged which was mostly unnoticeable under his thorough covering of blankets.

 

“Just sleep here.”

 

Prompto grunted removing his feet from his friends lap and sitting up. “Nah it’s cool. I’ll just… Walk.”

 

Throwing off a layer of blankets the prince rolled his eyes at the blond “Dude, I know you dig the whole ‘health craze’ shit, but not even you would willingly walk the whole hour back to your place.  And we have school tomorrow.” he fixed Prompto with a mock annoyed look. “Spec’s isn’t here, so he can’t drive you. Just stay over.”

 

Prompto chewed his lip, feeling unsure. He knew perfectly well Noct was joking and that he wasn’t actually annoyed at all. But a small part of his brain wondered if he had actually managed to annoy the prince somehow.Really he could have avoided this situation if he’d been keeping an eye on the time. Plus, there was the small matter, Prompto just remembered, of him trying to spend  _ less _ time with the prince. Sleeping in the same apartment as Noctis wasn’t the smartest way to distance himself. 

 

God he really was an idiot.

 

Going home now wasn’t really an option as the tired prince looked like he wasn’t open to discussion, but Prompto made one last feeble attempt to extract himself from the situation.

 

“Are.. are you sure? I really don’t mind wal-”

 

“Prom.”

 

The blond’s mouth snapped shut with an audible click. Setting the controller on the table, Noct straightened up with a groan, the last of the blankets rolling off his shoulders.

 

“Stop worrying so much dummy.” he flicked his friend in the head as he walked passed. “C’mon. We can crash  in my bed.”

 

Prompto blanked, “Uh I can just…” He gestured awkwardly to the couch and Noctis raised a sleepy brow.  
  
“Don’t be ridiculous. My bed’s big enough for both of us. Plus, setting up the futons a pain in the ass, never mind fetching all the extra bedding.” 

 

“I mean you’re not exactly lacking in the blankets department already.” he countered grabbing a handful of the blankets already strewn across the couch.

 

“Yeah but.. Pizza crumbs.” Noct offered half heartedly. “Just come on.”

 

Sighing Prompto forced himself off of the soft comfortable couch and trailed behind the other teen. He followed Noct to the door of the bedroom only to get hit with a bundle of something soft.

 

“Here. Probably more comfortable than trying to sleep in your uniform.”

 

Prompto stared at the bundle of clothes in his arms. Noct’s clothes. “Yeah ok… I’ll just go change.” he muttered awkwardly and headed towards the bathroom, ignoring the questioning look from his friend. He wasn’t the same awkward heavy boy he used to be but somehow the idea of stripping down in front of Noct, the person he’d changed so much for, was still terrifying. There was probably so much about him that wasn’t perfect. Sure the weight was gone but for one thing most 16 year old boys didn’t sport the amount of stretch marks he did.

 

Apparently, staying awake was too much for the prince, for when Prompto returned, Noctis was snuggled into his blankets, only visible as a big blob under the plush duvet. An unconscious fond smile flitted across Prompto’s face before the building unease in his gut found it’s way back to the forefront of his mind. It was fine. He’d go to sleep, go to school with Noct in the morning and then everything would be just like any other day. He could go back to his original plan, to phase himself out of Noct’s life. Sure that’s what he was supposed to be doing all of today, but tomorrow he would have more success.

 

Gingerly lifting a corner of the covers, Prompto slid into the plush bedding, sticking to the far edge away from the prince. He flipped around and put his back to the other boy, thinking it would be easier to relax if he wasn’t staring at the cause of his anxiety. But it didn’t help much. He could hear Noct’s soft, even breathing from the other side of the bed. It looked like the prince had conked out the moment his head hit the pillow and he had settled into an effortless slumber. Prompto let out a quiet huff, jealous of his friend’s ability to fall asleep so easily. He propped himself up on his elbows and reached over to shut off the bedside lamp, plunging the room into darkness, illuminated only by the soft light of the moon shining through the window and settling like snow on the prince’s hair. Prompto stared for a moment transfixed unconsciously scooting forward to get a glimpse of the raven haired boys tranquil, sleeping face. Long eyelashes rested against smooth, pale cheeks and his soft lips were parted just slightly. He looked almost angelic. The embodiment of a fairytale prince. Before he could stop himself, his fingers were gently brushing the prince’s fringe out of his closed eyes.

 

_ What are you doing? _

 

He snatched his hand back, eyes widening with alarm. What  _ was _ he doing?? Noctis had opened his home to him and was even letting him share his bed and Prompto was repaying him by being a giant creep. He bit his lip and pointedly laid back down with his back to the prince once again.This was all exactly the opposite of what he needed. More time around Noctis meant more opportunities for Prompto to slip up and do something to make Noct realize who he really was. Phasing himself out of Noct’s life was the most amicable way to do this. The way that would hurt the least.

 

He was so caught up in his own thoughts that he didn’t feel the bed shift. Didn’t notice the warm body moving up against him. That is, until an arm snaked around his waist.

 

Prompto froze. He could feel the prince’s heart beating rhythmically against his back, his even breaths tickling Prompto’s neck. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been this close to a person and he couldn’t help but melt into the warmth, the overwhelming familiarity and comfort of Noctis surrounding him. He wanted to let himself drift off to sleep in the safety and security of his friends embrace. 

 

But he knew he couldn’t. He absolutely could  _ not _ let himself give in to the comfort of Noct’s presence. Because pretty soon it would be gone and if he let himself have this moment it’d hurt so much worse.

 

The lump was back in his throat, making it hard to breathe again and his eyes were starting to burn. He pressed a hand over his mouth to stifle any involuntary sounds, lest he wake his sleeping friend, and focused on his breathing.  _ In and out, just calm down. _ But trying to force the panic back seemed to make it worse. His could feel a tremor creeping into his numb fingers.

 

_ Stop it, stop it, you’re gonna wake him up. _

 

He needed to get out. Carefully but firmly extracting himself from the other boy’s arms, Prompto rose on unsteady legs, one hand bracing against the wall for support. He moved as quickly as his wobbling knees allowed, managing to make it outside of the room, pulling the door shut behind him before his legs gave out.

 

_ Breathe in and out, gods why is this so hard?  _ His heart was pounding a mile a minute, deafeningly loud in his ears.

 

The door creaked open behind him.

 

“..Prom..?” came a sleep laden voice.

 

Prompto’s laboured breath caught in his throat.

 

“Prom.. You ok?”

 

He had to pull himself together and think of an excuse. He couldn’t let Noct see him like this. He couldn’t-

 

“Hey, woah you’re shaking.” said the other boy, moving around to kneel down in front of the blond. “Prom, hey look at me.”

 

Watery blue eyes snapped up to meet the prince’s concerned gaze. Taking one trembling, ice cold hand in his own, Noctis’ other hand came up to gently cup the blonde's cheek. Prompto flinched at the contact.

 

“Dude, what’s going on?”

 

What little semblance of self control Prompto had,  crumbled under the gentle touches from the other boy, an ugly sob tore out of his throat. Noctis’ eyes widened in bewilderment but he pulled the shaking boy into an embrace, tucking Prompto’s head against his chest. He started rubbing circles in Prompto’s back with one hand, the other carding through messy blonde locks. 

 

The floodgates were open and every breath Prompto drew came tearing out in a ragged sob, his shoulders trembling and fists curled into the fabric of Noct’s t-shirt.

 

_ No no no!! This wasn’t supposed to happen! _

 

Prompto was panicking and that only made the sobs louder. Noctis wasn’t supposed to see this side of him. this weak, pathetic, unstable nobody that Prompto had so carefully buried under a cheerful, outgoing persona. But it was over now. Noct knew. He was probably disgusted, but being  the kind, benevolent person he was, he probably felt the need to calm Prompto down before throwing him out. He could at least, Prompto thought bitterly, save Noctis the trouble. Once his racing heart relaxed, once his breathing evened out and he regained control of his weak, trembling limbs, he would leave without the prince’s suggestion. It’s the least he could do after eating his food, borrowing his clothes and having the audacity to accept the other boys hospitality. He had to calm down and he had to leave.

 

But he wasn’t calming down. His breathing was becoming more ragged the harder he tried to steady it.

 

Noct’s hand had stilled holding Prompto’s shoulders. “Prom. Ok, uh. Shit, I don’t know what to do.” There was a note of panic in the Prince’s voice. “I’m a bit lost… I…” He removed a hand from Prompto’s shoulder to drag over his face. It was then that Prompto realized the prince’s hands were shaking too. “Maybe I should call Iggy…”

 

_ NO! That was the LAST thing he needed, for the intimidatingly perfect advisor to see him like this.  _

 

But when he tried to tell Noctis as much, he just managed to make an odd strangled noise in his throat. The other boy started  to get up, probably to get his phone, but Prompto clung to his shirt insistently.

 

“Hey… Ok.. Ok I’ll stay here but you need to calm down ok?? Can you do that for me??” The prince soothed, sinking back to his previous position in front of the blonde. Prompto nodded feebly in response and tried again to focus on calming his laboured breaths.

 

“Just.. just breath.” The prince assured, running his hands up and down Prompto’s arms. “Follow my lead, alright?” Grasping one of Prompto’s hands in his own, he brought it up to rest on his chest. “In,” he took a deep breath and Prompto tried hard to match him. “And out.” a long exhalation. “Good, keep going. In.”

 

Finally, his breathing started to calm, as did his racing heart. Noct’s slightly wavering but firm voice was guiding him, uttering reassurances until Prompto felt like he could breath normally again.

 

“There.. You’re alright…” gently detangling himself from the blond but keeping one hand on his arm, the prince sat back on his haunches, leveling his gaze on his friend. “You scared the shit outta me, dude.”

 

The blonde opened his mouth but found that his voice felt dry and scratchy. He let out a weak cough. Noctis’ face contorted in worry and he got up to grab a glass of water.

 

“Here.” he offered the glass to his friend who took it in hands that were far steadier now than before. Prompto took a small sip and offered his friend a weak smile that didn’t reach his eyes.

 

“Thanks…”

 

Noct was still giving that concerned look and Prompto didn’t know how to respond to it. Really, it wasn’t the look he was expecting. There was no trace of disgust or anger- he just looked worried. Prompto broke eye contact nervously and stared at his hands.

 

“Does….” the prince stared and began picking at the carpet. He seemed uncomfortable as well which made Prompto’s stomach clench involuntarily. “Does that happen.. A lot..?” the dark haired boy questioned hesitantly.

 

Prompto didn’t know how to answer. The whole thing seemed to be making Noctis upset and he felt like answering in the affirmative would make him more upset. But if he said it didn’t happen often, then he would have to give him some kind of reason why it happened. He opened his mouth to respond then closed it again.

 

The prince gracelessly fell back onto his butt with a shaky sigh and ran a hand through his hair. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to… just..” he worried his teeth on his bottom lip. “If it helps to talk about it, I’ll listen…”

 

_ He’s just trying to be nice. _

 

Prompto squared his shoulders and clenched his teeth. The prince already had so much on his plate and didn’t need to add someone else’s issues to deal with. But being the perfect, wonderful person he was, he would never say as much to Prompto meaning he had to be the decisive one here. He would have to make this choice for both of them and consider Noct’s kindness towards him that night a parting gift.

 

Prompto forced a smile on his face, something he’d done often but it felt more foreign than ever.

 

“Hey, it’s fine. I just.. I’m just not feeling well. Sorry to freak you out like that…”

 

Noctis eyes snapped up to meet his looking extremely confused.

 

“No.. I mean it’s fine I just-”

 

“I think I’ll just head home.” He climbed robotically to his feet. His whole body felt numb and cold and Noctis was still staring at him with a mix of worry and confusion.

 

“Prom you don’t have to-” the other boy began to argue getting to his feet as well. Prompto was already moving about the apartment gathering up his things.

 

“No it’s fine, really. It would probably just be nice to be home, you know?” Prompto cut him off throwing another reassuring smile over his shoulder while gathering up his clothes. “I’ll get your stuff back to you tomorrow ok?”

 

Noctis opened his mouth like he was about to say something and then closed it. He rubbed at his arm absentmindedly, eyes skittering off to the side.

 

“Well… Ok.”

 

Prompto forced another smile and made for the door.

“.. Text me when your home?” came a meek response.

 

Prompto hesitated, hand on the door knob.

 

“Sure thing buddy!”

 

And he was out the door without a second glance finally letting the smile slip from his face.

 

“Bye Noct…”


End file.
